Busted Poooooocket...

So last night, Chris and I went and saw one of our most favorite comedians ever, Jim Gaffigan. For those of you who know us, you know that we are late to everything. I mean everything. It's mostly my husband!! He will be late to his own funeral, I swear. But what I have learned about Chris is that when he is excited about something he is on time or early. Write it down folks, we were in our seat 20 minutes early. That's right. The show started at 8:00 but we left the house at 6:30 and got some dinner. We were actually laughing about the fact that we left early.

The show was great. He did a bunch of new stuff that we had never heard. One of the great things about Jim Gaffigan is that his show is pretty clean. I don't think I hear him say one cuss word. His material is just everyday stuff that is funny. He was talking about camping and bowling. It was just hilarious. His most famous bit that he has is about Hot Pockets. Click here to watch a clip.

We had decided earlier that we were going to stick around for the meet and great. We had the camera and we even stopped at the grocery store and bought 2 boxes of Hot Pockets. I knew that wasn't an original idea, because on his DVD, Beyond the Pale, there is a special on fans bringing them. BUT, what I did do was tear out the back part of the box that talks about how they are "Good in so many ways". That way, we wouldn't have this big box and look stupid like other people did.

The show is over and evidently the line starts outside of the Alabama Theatre. Being a person that works downtown, I was just prepared for crazy people. I only saw one guy who was looking for the bus station. One of my co-workers and I joke about how that is just the crazy station. We are standing at the top of the theater waiting for the crowd to clear out. We see Jim and are so excited but then we see this fan that is jumping up and down looking stupid. We agreed NOT to do that. So we decide to go and get in line and we wanted to be towards the end. The line was kind of long and for a brief moment, Chris didn't want to stand in it. I gave him the choice of either waiting in line or going home and having a ticked off wife. He chose to stay. We were in line for about an hour and a half. Yes. This girl in front of me kept turning around and staring at us. I finally just stared back every time she did. I did not blink. I just gazed at her. What was her problem? Get out of my face!! These 4 guys in front of them had Chris & I dying because they were such tools. They were talking about different levels of a computer game and getting into the "trophy room" and then they had a discussion of which was better Longhorn Steakhouse or Texas Roadhouse. LOSERS!!!

So here we are, in line with goobers but we had finally made it inside the building. We can see Jim!! EEK!! We were internally screaming like kids, but outside we were just cool. I get our stuff out for him to sign and for whatever reason, he (Jim, not Chris) keeps looking at me. I don't know why. I would just smile and he smiled back. We're inching closer and closer. The 4 tools are with him. Chris has the camera read. The staring lunatic and her whatever are with him. WE'RE UP NOW!

Some guy takes the camera and we greet Jim. He looks at our Hot Pocket box and reads the "Good in So Many Ways" bit and I say "Yeah and it's Beef Taco. How delicious is that?" and he laughed. It wasn't a courtesy laugh, it was an actual laugh. I know because I saw him chuckle on stage and I know everything, right?! JIM GAFFIGAN laughed at me. Me! Chris made some comment and Jim laughed too. I couldn't believe it. He thought we were funny. We thank him for taking the time to wait so long and are moving on to take the picture. Here is the best/worst part. Are you ready?!

Time to take the picture. We get on each side of the camera and smile. 1, 2.........................nothing. Camera doesn't work. Are you seriously effing kidding me. The guy tries again. He and Jim are so nice and he tells us to just step aside and work on the camera. They don't make us leave but we are feverishly working on what to do. There is a struggle/argument of "I can fix it" from both of us. Chris wins and is working on it. We get it ready. We interrupt the line and the guy tries again. 1, 2.....................nothing again. The battery died. Are you serious!!! I quickly tell Chris to get out his cell phone. It works, we thank them for dealing with our madness and we leave. I am aggrivated but at least we have a picture and signatures.

Here's to you Jim Gaffigan and your bacon!

Items out and ready to sign

He signed them, WOO HOO!!!

Chris, Jim and me

New home?

Anybody want a dog? I'm going to kill Happy. He has now destroyed all of my couch pillows. Chris came home from work to a big mess. Oh & Hap is just trying to look all innocent but I see him. He is lucky I didn't come home to this because I would've opened the front door & drop kicked him!! I know Bear was watching it going "OOOH, you're gonna get in trouble". Happy has one more strike & he is out. First strike was my digital memory card. It had pictures of me with my grandfather at one of our wedding showers. It had all kinds of pictures. Second strike is this one:

He better watch out!

Hello Ike

Well, mom and I survived a hurricane. We left for the beach on Thursday and the only rain we got was on Thursday afternoon on the way. We stayed at The Beach Club in Gulf Shores Alabama and it was so nice!!! If you aren't familiar with the location, it's off the beaten path. However, we were at the beach. For a minute, we thought we would be at the bay, but luckily we weren't. The wind was so crazy. This picture was taken from my chair at the pool (there really wasn't any beach to lay out in because the tide was in) and it just doesn't capture how windy it was. I mean, I set my flip flops down and they blew away. I would lay in my chair and have to hold on for dear life. I was one of few people who were laying out because it was sunny - off and on. On Friday afternoon, we walked over to the Clubhouse and got some lunch and then did nothing. We read and confession - I took a 2 hour nap!!! It was too cloudy to lay out and we didn't want to chance the bay flooding. Why? Well, Thursday night after we got groceries, we were heading down the 11 mile stretch of road that leads to the resort. There is a sign that says "ROAD CLOSED 5 MILE POINT" and my stomach went into my throat. Turns out, we were on a road that takes you to the Dauphin Island Ferry and somehow it's related to that. We didn't know that until Saturday. Oh well. The tide was low so we walked on the tiny beach that finally showed up Friday night. We watched some movies, had a few cocktails and just did nothing. Saturday, we went to the pool and then went to Lamberts. MMMMM It was so good. Then we went shopping and then headed home. We packed up/cleaned up and watched the Coco Chanel movie. I really liked it and will probably watch it again. I have more pictures from that and the Nooney trip to the Alabama game LAST weekend, but I do not have my camera and the beach pictures are on moms camera. We had a blast and now I must unpack and try to cure my "Sunday Night Blues". That's a term that I used growing up about school. More pictures etc later.

I just got over a crazy cold. In fact I helped Mimi pack (dangit she is gone to St. Louis) when I was crazy sick. I just think it was hybernating because I started feeling bad on Friday afternoon. As long as I can remember, my throat hurts and then I get a cold. How does one get sick (not food related) on vacatgion?? Who knows. Well my throat started hurting but I don't know if it was just all that crazy wind or what. I don't know. Anyway, I'm off to unpack and hang out with my husband - that I missed dearly and my crazy animals. HOLLA!!!

The Traffic Gangsta

First of all, let me start with this: I was stuck in traffic this morning. I was so aggrivated but this was me:


I mean, I thought I was going to scream!!! But thinking of that clip from Office Space, made me think of another clip from that movie. I'm just a white girl from Alabama. However, I love rap/hip hop music. I don't know why. Sometimes the songs are stupid and about nothing. Amy & I talk all the time about how we could be rappers because you can rap about anything. For example, who knew the childhood game Marco Polo would be a song. But it is. Hey this is a perfect way for me to promote our new line of fragrances entitled "Cookies and Poo". Could you imagine? Geez. Anyway back to rap and this clip. It cracks me up!!
Editor's Note: WARNING - FOUL LANGUAGE (I couldn't find an edited version, sorry):

Peace out!

To Mimi

A few weeks ago, I found out that my bestest female friend and her husband, are moving to St. Louis. In fact, they are moving in 2 weeks. To most people, that isn't a big deal. But as long as I can remember, Amy was always just right down the road.

Last weekend, we had a going away party for Amy and Adam. It all happened so suddenly. If you had told me at the beginning of July that this was happening, I would've told you that you were making it up!!! Amy & I have been best friends since 1986, when my family moved to Birmingham. I can't ever remember a time in my life when she wasn't just 10 minutes down the road. For whatever reason, we were the last 2 to get married and seemed to be the only girls out of our friends to never have a boyfriend. At one point, I was convinced that we would be the crazy cat ladies living down the street. While I am so thrilled for her new job, because her current job SUCKS, I am going to miss her something terrible. Amy is such a one in a million person that nobody could ever replace her. We have always just been able to entertain each other and for whatever reason, we turn into 13 year olds when we are together. When we are apart, we can act like mature adults. Put us together and we laugh at anything!! I mean, having known her since 4th grade, I can't really put into words the kind of relationship that we have! Her family is like a second family to me. My husband says to me "She's only going to be 8 hours away" and that is true. However, I'll miss her more than she'll know. I can't imagine what it will be like for her away from her friends and family. But the good news is that technology these days are amazing. There is phone, e-mail and instant chatting. I really think I'll miss calling her & Adam up and seeing if they want to meet us for Mexican. I find it very very very very ironic that the one restaurant we would always meet at, is relocating. Amy, don't you think that's kind of weird?! I really don't think I can go there without them, but I think we just might do it and pretend they are there. :) Again, how do you explain a relationship that lasted 22 years? I don't think I'd care to exploit that here!! I'm going to keep those memories in my heart and between us. Who else in the world would still giggle at the Trash Tornado (or was it hurricane?) or the fact that our parents would sit at separate tables when we all went out to eat. Sometimes I think our husbands want to do the same thing. Amy, since you actually read this, I promise I'll call you every weekend so it's like you are down the street. I love you more than you could ever imagine and I cherish our friendship more than anything in the world. I have always thought of you as a sister. God has truly blessed me by putting you in my life. When we moved here, I was determined NOT to make friends with anybody. I mean, we moved so much, that I thought we would move again. Believe it or not, being in Troup 551 was the best thing ever. Even though we were scared to death that one night (that seemed like 10 years) at Girl Scout Camp and how dang excited I was to see the tan van that day, I cherish that more than anything in the world. I only hope one day, that our kids will be just as close as we are. Nobody will ever take your place in my heart and for that I love you Manygirl!!!! We will come visit as often as possible. Even if it means that we eat Ramen noodles forever to afford a plane ticket. I look forward to many more years of friendship. God bless you!!

Here are some pictures from the going away party:

Mr. P, Mason, Adam and sweet Hallie

Amy (trying not to cry) and Adam when we presented them with a memory book of old pictures & notes from friends



Amy, Adam, and her family (Parrish & White family- my second family)


Me, Amy and Sarah

Chris & Adam (The On Tap Brothers)


The Nooney's and Alvis' (thanks for holding my arm Amy)

Amy and I at the chocolate fountain - best picture ever!!

OH SNAP!!!!

I KNEW IT! I KNEW IT!!!! I have been so obsessed with the age of the Chinese gymnasts at the Olympic games. I never once believed they were 16-20. NO WAY!!! Well, I stumbled on this interesting article!!!!

Click on the link below for proof:
CHINESE LIARS

1990 called...it wants its lunch back

Every Saturday morning, I go to the grocery store. Chris & I used to go together every 2 weeks. However, we decided it was best for me to go once a week. That way, things wouldn't go bad and we could get what we need for the week. Well, I got our usual items for the week. I bring my lunch 4 days a week. Working downtown, there aren't too many options. There are a few locally owned restaurants, but for the most part, it's more cost effective to bring my lunch.

Well when I was at the grocery store, looking for lunchmeat, I ran into Lunchables. I used to eat them ALL the time when I was in 7th grade. I mean that's about all that I ate in school. There are tons of Lunchables now. I mean they have pizza and even hamburgers. They even have ones with a drink & dessert. Whenever I have kids, they are going to eat these!!! Well as I was looking, I found an "old school" Lunchable with just turkey, cheese & crackers. I decided to buy one and I ate it for lunch. It actually was really good. I think I might get some next week and pair it with a salad for work. It's weird because I was just laughing at how I felt like I was in middle school. Oh and no, I'm not going to "tightroll" my pants or write notes to Sarah about how in love I am with Justin Shores. That's so 7th grade.