Bitter McGee

When I was younger, we moved around a bunch. My dad was a branch manager for a company and he got transferred a lot. I was born in Georgia, moved to Pennsylvania, moved to Kansas (for 9 months - my entire 3rd grade school year) and then Alabama. We have been here since. Eight weeks after we moved here, they offered dad a job in Texas but he turned it down. When we moved here, I was very hesitant to make friends because I thought we were going to move.

Anyway, I have so many childhood memories and I can honestly say, they are all good. Except for two. One is my fault. The other is my mom’s and they both transpired in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania.

It was a cold winter day…ok not really. It was my 8th birthday and my birthday is June 25th. I had a party and had a bunch of friends over. It was a typical party. We had cake and ice cream and I opened all my gifts. I’m sure there was a theme in there somewhere. Well, when it was over, my mother specifically looked me in my eyes and said “Do not take anything out of the packages until I get back”. She went outside to talk to some parents. My friends and I were sitting around looking at all of my gifts. I had a My Little Pony, a new Walkman, and a stamp set. I had other things too, but I can’t remember. One of my friends says “Hey, take that out of the box” and I tell her no. She then helps herself to taking something out of a package. At that pivotal moment, I should’ve intervened and put an end to it. But no. I didn’t. I just helped myself. I put on the earphones to my Walkman and did a dance like I was listening to music. You know, flaunting my stuff. Next thing I know, my mom is standing over me. I will NEVER forget that knot in my stomach and my friends staring at me. I just stared at her and she stared back. Cut to me being without all of my birthday toys for two weeks. For an 8 year old, that is an eternity. Before I got them back, she explained to me why she took them away and I could not argue. I ‘m sure I cried because I was 8. So mom, I’m sorry for not listening. That was very much my fault.

However…she owes me an apology and it all revolves around two words: PICTURE PAGE.

I used to watch Nickelodeon all the time as a child. The main reason is so that I could watch this:


(Side note: Is it me or does “Wellington” look like a Band-Aide more than a worm?? Why does Bill Cosby make that goofy face? Wait, I’m analyzing this from a 30 year olds perspective. My niece would think it is funny)

I wanted a Picture Page so bad. Yes, I understood that my pen would not make the “beep bo beep boo beep beep boo boo” noises when I drew. I didn’t care. I just wanted to draw with Bill Cosby and Mortimer!! What did I do? I wrote down the phone number and gave it to my mom. How nice was that of me? She wouldn’t have to do anything except call!! I specifically told her I wanted it for either a birthday or Christmas gift. I have no idea what time of year it was but it was one of those holidays. Mom told me no problem. I mean, I was a good kid for the most part. I had my ups and downs, but I was pretty good. Guess what? Never got the Picture Page. Not sure what horrible thing I did to make her throw away the number but she never ordered it for me. Hi. I'm Susan, I'm 30 years old and I’m still bitter because I never got my Picture Page.