I got you beat!

Check this out. Chris & I went out with Amy & Adam. I was minding my business…BAM, ceiling tile at the restaurant fell on my head. No let me rephrase that - WET ceiling tile fell on my head. The air conditioner was leaking and caused the tile to rot. At first, I really thought some crazy person threw a glass at me. My sweater and my entire right side was soaked. I, along with Amy, immediately busted out with laughter because A) it was random and B) it was funny. The wait staff comes over and I was extremely embarrassed. I don't know why. It's not like I fell. I wanted them to go away and I wanted my head to stop throbbing. The more that I laughed, the more that tears started to flow. My head was hurting. I’m laughing and it looks like I’m crying from laughter but I wasn’t. Don’t get me wrong, it was funny, but it hurt. It was “ha ha” then “boo hoo”. Then, all of a sudden I had to get out of there. I asked Chris if Amy & Adam could drive him home & I left. I was very embarrassed and I kept getting looks and wanted to crawl into a hole. Why was I so mortified?

The owner called me Sunday, but I didn’t get to talk to him. Chris & I were at Lowe’s. For the first time, I re-planted some flowers for our patio. It looks so nice & spring like. Anyway, looking back at it, I wish I had told them they could reach me at my place of business, which happens to be a law firm. I only wanted to mess with them. On Monday, several co-workers were like “Which attorney are you going to use?”. I got tickled at them. I did speak with an actual attorney and her response was that sometimes the hassle of a lawsuit is worse than the incident itself. Except, when you get hit by a MAC truck like my good friend did. She was walking in the parking lot & she literally bounced off the hood. Crazy stuff.

Nonetheless, I was never going to sue them. That thought only occurred as my head was throbbing. Perhaps if they had not paid for our meal/drinks or not come running over and apologized then maybe so. I had a headache for a day & a half but nothing to go to court over.

There are two morals to this story:
1. Look up at the ceiling before you sit at a restaurant
2. If you ever see something fall on somebody, please do me a favor and don't stare at them. It only makes the situation worse. You can laugh, but just make sure they don't see you laughing. Hide your face in a napkin or shirt. Whatever, just keep it to yourself.

Hey, Amy....

I don't know what else to say about not posting every hour on the hour. I have been sitting at home doing nothing for days. I didn't know I could be so selfish. This is for you kid:

Amy Leigh

GROSS!!!

I saw this infomercial the other day and it grossed me out. If you don't like feet (Tim) then you might not want to watch it.

Ped Egg

There are several hundred things wrong with this infomercial. My response to the whole thing is this: JUST GO GET A PEDICURE!! I mean, while you're busy pouring your "fillings" out and saving money, I am gagging at the television. I actually yelled out "GROSS!" to the tv when I saw it. I am disgusted by this product. Scraping an orange, a balloon and my foot??!! What!!! Oh...ewww. I must go throw up now. I mean I'm all about saving money, but I'd rather go once a month and get my feet done. Otherwise, I feel like I have some crazy foot fetish - ewww!! I'much rather go in public and have witnesses that I am getting pretty feet.

Speaking of that, ladies, spring is upon us. Let's make sure we all go get a pedicure and get rid of our ugly winter feet. I need to call my mom and remind her because she doesn't read this. But she loves to get pedicures! You go mom! Anyway, it's just a small token that you can give to society. We all enjoy nice feet, so take an hour and $20-$25 and make a difference to the environment.

Digital Shorts

I love the Digital Shorts from Saturday Night Live. They are just so random. It's clips like these that just encourage my urge to be on SNL. Andy Samberg is a trip. I don't know why, but I just think he is so absolutely hilarious!!! Here are a few of my favorites. I do not think these are appropriate for kids, not that kids read my website.

Did you know they won an Emmy for this clip?
_ _ _ _ in a box

I'm Ghost Like Swazye!!
Chronicles of Narnia

Believe in your dreams!!! This is so random!
Andy Punching

Are you McSure...from before!!!!!!!!!??
Andy Walking

There are many other, but you can look around on NBC's website for yourself. Laser Cats 2 and Roy Rulez are pretty good too. Gotta go! Laundry calls (BOOOOOO!!!)

Bitter McGee

When I was younger, we moved around a bunch. My dad was a branch manager for a company and he got transferred a lot. I was born in Georgia, moved to Pennsylvania, moved to Kansas (for 9 months - my entire 3rd grade school year) and then Alabama. We have been here since. Eight weeks after we moved here, they offered dad a job in Texas but he turned it down. When we moved here, I was very hesitant to make friends because I thought we were going to move.

Anyway, I have so many childhood memories and I can honestly say, they are all good. Except for two. One is my fault. The other is my mom’s and they both transpired in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania.

It was a cold winter day…ok not really. It was my 8th birthday and my birthday is June 25th. I had a party and had a bunch of friends over. It was a typical party. We had cake and ice cream and I opened all my gifts. I’m sure there was a theme in there somewhere. Well, when it was over, my mother specifically looked me in my eyes and said “Do not take anything out of the packages until I get back”. She went outside to talk to some parents. My friends and I were sitting around looking at all of my gifts. I had a My Little Pony, a new Walkman, and a stamp set. I had other things too, but I can’t remember. One of my friends says “Hey, take that out of the box” and I tell her no. She then helps herself to taking something out of a package. At that pivotal moment, I should’ve intervened and put an end to it. But no. I didn’t. I just helped myself. I put on the earphones to my Walkman and did a dance like I was listening to music. You know, flaunting my stuff. Next thing I know, my mom is standing over me. I will NEVER forget that knot in my stomach and my friends staring at me. I just stared at her and she stared back. Cut to me being without all of my birthday toys for two weeks. For an 8 year old, that is an eternity. Before I got them back, she explained to me why she took them away and I could not argue. I ‘m sure I cried because I was 8. So mom, I’m sorry for not listening. That was very much my fault.

However…she owes me an apology and it all revolves around two words: PICTURE PAGE.

I used to watch Nickelodeon all the time as a child. The main reason is so that I could watch this:


(Side note: Is it me or does “Wellington” look like a Band-Aide more than a worm?? Why does Bill Cosby make that goofy face? Wait, I’m analyzing this from a 30 year olds perspective. My niece would think it is funny)

I wanted a Picture Page so bad. Yes, I understood that my pen would not make the “beep bo beep boo beep beep boo boo” noises when I drew. I didn’t care. I just wanted to draw with Bill Cosby and Mortimer!! What did I do? I wrote down the phone number and gave it to my mom. How nice was that of me? She wouldn’t have to do anything except call!! I specifically told her I wanted it for either a birthday or Christmas gift. I have no idea what time of year it was but it was one of those holidays. Mom told me no problem. I mean, I was a good kid for the most part. I had my ups and downs, but I was pretty good. Guess what? Never got the Picture Page. Not sure what horrible thing I did to make her throw away the number but she never ordered it for me. Hi. I'm Susan, I'm 30 years old and I’m still bitter because I never got my Picture Page.

A new finding...

Today was such a crazy day. But not in a good way. I was caught in the middle of a situation that had nothing to do with me. I wish I could even say that it was drama with co-workers, but it was not!! It had to do with one attorney who had issues with how much he was charging clients. The only thing I needed to know was the end result. Oh there was a meeting in the boardroom called and evidently, I handled myself "professionally". Um, thank you? How are you acting professional when you are sitting and basically watching someone pitch a fit? I don't know but I was so aggravated because it really didn't have much to do with me. Whatev....

These past few weeks, I have found myself watching Nancy Grace. Girlfriend is a trip. I think it's a humor factor, but something intrigues me. I wish I could pin point it. I really think it's because she asks such crazy questions and looks insane. Sometimes, I find myself on her side and kind of yelling at the television "YEAH! That's what I'm talking about!" Ok not really, but maybe in my head. Then there is her "trusty sidekick" Sue Moss. She screams like nobody has ear pieces and they can't hear her in Georgia - from New York. I don't know.

It doesn't take much to entertain me.

Semi-Weekend, rated PG-13???

This weekend was so great!! The weather was very spring-like. Friday we went out on a date! We had dinner at a local BBQ restaurant that we haven't been too in a long time. Saturday, we just sat around. While I was still in my pajamas at 4:45, Chris suggests that we invite mom and dad to dinner. We had some steaks in the fridge and could run to the grocery store for some baked potatoes. So, I called mom & dad up and they came. They were so thrilled to come hang out. Dinner was yummy!

Yesterday was just as beautiful outside. I got up and went to a local lake and walked around the track. It was just so nice and I never realized how much I looked like Casper the friendly ghost. Girlfriend needs a tan!!! Anyway, we saw Semi-Pro with Will Ferrell. It actually was pretty good. It wasn't his best movie, but it was pretty good. Wasn't aware that the language was going to be so intense, but I've heard worse. Definitely not a kid friendly movie. I got so tickled at Andre 3000!!! He just seems like he would be a fun person to have as a friend. It caused me to bust out Stankonia and listen to Mrs. Jackson on my way to work today. (Amy, do you remember when Adam said this was about Janet Jackson??) Anyway, one of my favorite lines from the movie was this "Oh I feel like I have cat piss in my eyes!! UGH!!!OWWWW!! _ _ _ _ sandwich!" Chris & I laughed going home. I really love Will Ferrell.

I just created a scaling system in my head, using chocolate bars.
1 bar = would never see it again
2 bars = wouldn't watch until it came on cable
3 bars = might rent it
4 bars = would rent it
5 bars = would own it

So, here's what I give Semi-Pro:






I'm no professional, so this is just my opinion.